It's been a long time since I've written anything here. I'm not a very extravertic guy so I rarely feel a need to write about what I feel/think and most of the time a short tweet is more than enough. However, tonight I feel a big urge to rant about why I think my current job sucks. I wonder whether that means I'm getting burned out? Hopefully not...
- I don't have a feeling of progress, of learning, any more. I've been with the company for almost 3.5 years and until recently (half a year maybe?) I felt I was learning a lot every day. Now I feel like I'm doing the same, repetitive tasks every day, and the first thought I get in the morning is "I wish I could get another hour of sleep" instead of "Yay, time to get some great stuff done".
Maybe that was because I was working in slow-paced projects in which I had enough slack to allow some innovation? And that's funny because in that project I was complaining about not having enough to do. Now I see it was probably what gave me a chance to try out new things, to spend a lot of time of fixing stuff that had been done wrong etc.
- I don't get a chance to come up with complete solutions. That's because we've got an internal framework that's supposed to deliver every bit of technical solution we might need to create our business components. While it might seem that not having to deal with infrastructural stuff is an advantage (and I know some people who just hate such tasks), for me it makes my tasks feel "incomplete". I like to have the right balance between purely technical tasks and modelling my domain model, and now one part has been taken away from me. And I don't want to move to the framework team because (of course that's just the tip of the iceberg) it would just make me work on technical solutions, separated of any business context (and that sucks terribly - I strongly believe that frameworks - at least internal - should be pulled out of existing code, not pulled into it).
- I'm a team leader now. And I sincerely don't like it. I have to do some things (reports, keeping an eye on some things, meeeeeeetings) which just feel like a waste of time for me. And that time cannot be spent on doing some useful programming work. I really enjoy being technical lead, I love architecture design tasks, but really hate to sit down in meetings that often have no outcome that would be in any way important to the team I'm part of.
Okay, the rant is over now. I could probably carry on but now my frustration is gone, replaced by sleepiness, and now I just want to go to bed and have those 7 hours of sleep before getting up again and thinking... will not repeat myself.
May tomorrow be better than today and may the stars be right!